questioned friendships?
why is it that relationships are so difficult sometimes?why is there competition between relationships? (if i'm with this person then that person will be upset with me)
why do we feel "left out" if we are not sharing the same experiences as our friends?
do you have a friend you can trust to stand up for you when you are not around?
why is it that there are times when all the relationships in the world still leave you feeling alone?
why is it that people who are in a relationship give of themselves differently? (one will be completly vunerable, the other only goes part way.)
why is it that people feel used in relationships? is this really possible?
how do you keep a relationship close?
why is it that some of the people who are the furthest away from me are the closest and some who are the closest are the furthest?
can you love someone if you have an agenda?
even if that agenda is "to build a friendship"?
is "building a friendship" a motive that prevents love from being the center of your relationship?
i have got great friends whom i deeply love. yet, it seems the deeper the love the deeper the pain that goes along with it. i suppose that is just part of the deal. when you give of yourself wholely, you allow your whole self to feel the pain.
and that can hurt.
4 Comments:
There are days when I think I could live in a small hut in the middle of nowhere all by myself, and the world would be right. But there are only days that I feel that way, and many more days that I don't, so I best learn how to deal with pain.
You pose a lot of great question, many I've thought of at one point or another. Just wanted to say that I've enjoyed reading your last few blogs.
I'll take my first instinct crack at the questions you pose... although you may have been just sharing feelings and insights and not necessarily searching for "Mr.Wizard" to answer them.. but here goes...
why is it that relationships are so difficult sometimes? people + sin = sinners
why is there competition between relationships? (if i'm with this person then that person will be upset with me) insecurity / competition / popularity / etc...
why do we feel "left out" if we are not sharing the same experiences as our friends? (see above) but also I think that a part of what makes a friend is shared experiences. This is not totally true from my point of view, but holds a lot of weight.
do you have a friend you can trust to stand up for you when you are not around? you sucka
why is it that there are times when all the relationships in the world still leave you feeling alone? good question... I feel that way when my relationships are run on guilt, ministry, duty, projects, etc... where I stay in control of really being real. Then I never really engaged in the first place - although I pretended to.
why is it that people who are in a relationship give of themselves differently? (one will be completly vunerable, the other only goes part way.) past issues, personality, trust levels, emotional maturity, different views on the relationship, etc...
why is it that people feel used in relationships? is this really possible? because we all are takers when it comes down to it... - don't make me defend that... I need to think more about that statement, but it rang a bell in me.
how do you keep a relationship close? time, communication, concern, encouragement, fun, etc...
why is it that some of the people who are the furthest away from me are the closest and some who are the closest are the furthest? the light attracts the bugs... just kidding - kinda :) Could the ones further away be closer because there is less of a chance of screwing it up? or it becomes idealized? or does distance necessitate a distance that must be overcome and therefore, you stay connected to those you really desire to connect with in spite of barriers, but will let other sideliners go with that barrier... good question....
can you love someone if you have an agenda?
even if that agenda is "to build a friendship"?
is "building a friendship" a motive that prevents love from being the center of your relationship?
I think we should cut ourselves some slack on the agenda thing and just enjoy having fun and building relationships. I had an agenda with Vicki - to date her - without that I may be single right now waiting for pure motivation to hit me. I trust your heart man - cut yourself some slack on the agenda stuff - you are a good fella!
Great questions. So, I leave you with this statement that I taught my daughter... Hi my name is Steve, what is yours? Do you want to play? And with that - a friendship is born.
i'm tracking with ya bro. many of these questions came from conversations with a few people in the previous days. when i hear other people share about the difficulties they have their friends, it makes me appreciate the friends i have so much more.
the challenges, laughter, encouragement and joys that i share with you guys are on such a different plane than most others.
i think the greatest thing that can be shared between friends is freedom. and i'm talking a freedom in Christ, kinda freedom. free to be me, scabs and all. free to love each other without expectations or agendas (though i understand your pursuit of vick, i think now after years of sharing life, you love her asking nothing in return... well, maybe a trombone :))freedom to disagree, freedom to cry (pizza ranch anyone), freedom to have convesations with no end, etc. etc.
for too many people friendships aren't freeing.
for too many people friendships aren't centered on Jesus.
any who...
Post a Comment
<< Home